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My girlfriends panties? My girlfriend has the tightest and cutest *** eva and she used to know it by wearing french knickers and thongs all the time, now she only wants to wear panties that cover her *** why is this?? Also what do other women like to wear? | | She might feel more comfortable in her panties now. I love to where Brazilian cut boy shorts. | Weird subject... Upskirts.? If girls dont like to be upskirted/dont want to be upskirted, why the hell dont they wear shorts under there skirt or atleast some panties that covers there ***?!?! | | Its just that they want the privilege to choose who to reveal themselves to........on with the show. | Help f**king in public plz help? me and my boyfriend want 2 fk in public again but we r abit scared as heres last times story, well we both planned too go 2 the cinima during the day and go in a pg because we wanted 2 be riski so i wore a very short skirt with no panties and the skirt just covered my *** you could just see the bottom of my crack because my skirt was 2 short an i couldent help tht coz it wa the onli 1 i gt an mi bf forced me 2 wear 1 and he wore sum loose small shorts and when we gt there we gt a few dirti looks as we bought the tickets on the way into the movie i decieded i needed the toilet so i went in did my buissness and as i walked out a girl shouted slut because my skirt had curled under and you could see my clit and my pubes as i forgot to wax aniwai i put it back down and went out and me and my bf went into the cineama and sat in the corner we thought we were ok but it was jampacked wen the movie started but we reli wanted 2 so we did i sat on his knee and he took off his shorts and slipped them in my hand bag and i pulled my skirt off as we got going ( his penis up my vag) i jus couldent help making noises because i find it hard not 2 and he got a bit carried away and forgot were he was and ripped his shirt off and started unbuttoning my blouse i tried 2 not let him but he was 2 forceful and he wipped it offwe carried on a few little guys were looking at us not saying anithing jjust staring no adults spotted us i dont think but he got carrried away and unhucked my bra and took it off i reli hated him for tht as a baby pointed at me and shouted boobies and his mother looked and screamed OMG and then everyone looked she ran and got the manager who paused the film and turned the lights on and told us 2 get out and didnt give us chance 2 get dressed just kiked us out and we got a bus there and didnt have aniwai of getting home as i left mi handbag in the cinima with chlothes and the bus driver would neva have let us on luckily while no one was there we rung a friend on the pay phone who brang clothes and picked us up but we havent done anything like this scince HELP.!!!! | | That looks fun, I must do something like that before I die. | What change would you love to see happen? That I could see "Mememolly" turn into a sexy prostitute, get a tan, do porn, maybe put on some french manicures, get some sexy seductive *** curves and a fine ***, some sexy leather gloves that doesnt cover her finger, and pink sexy panties and some sexy pink lipgloss, make up, and big titties etc. that would be sexy! HEEEEELP!! LOL!! ;D | | Homosexuals being more accepted in society | Why am I having these dreams? Please help? Lately I've been having sexual dreams about and/or involving her. I told her yesterday about my repetitive dreams of having sex with her, and last night I had 2 different ones and the repetitive one. The first one: I went to talk to one of my friends in a bizarre looking room, and when I finished, I left. Before I completely was gone (to where I would go is unknown), I heard my girlfriends voice and instantly dashed back in, spotted her on a couch with only a bra on and clutching her panties (this is most likely from the episode of Forensic Files I watched just before I went to bed, in which the girl was killed with only a bra on and clutching her panties) and covered in green sharpie, and as soon as she saw me she jumped. She said she wouldn't go any farther than this and got redressed, and this dream concerns me because it gave me the inability to be openly sexual with her (which I normally am), and a strong feeling when around her friend in the dream who was leading this whatever was going on.
Second: I was sleeping and suddenly, she appeared, in some sexy outfit, but this didn't look anything like her, but I knew my mind was trying to **** with me, so I paid no mind to the differences and she was like crawling up my legs, rubbing her *** on my crotch and I jumped awake swinging my arms, like to ward her off. I don't know why. What do these dreams mean? | | Mmm its getting warm in here lol. It looks like you want her, you want to be with her. Or that you are unhappy with the girl you have already. I used to have those kind of dreams all the time when I was with my ex and it was because he was treating me like **** and I wanted something better. | Why does my girlfriend dress slutty? My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 6 weeks now and I like her but i'm concerned about the way she dresses in public and around friends. She wears shorts that are way too tight and short (i'm talkin showing butt cheek) which I don't mind if we're at home but in public is a little different. Last week a couple of my friends we're at my place and she pranced around in front of them wearing nothing but knee socks, panties and a t-shirt that didn't even cover her ***. She was literally just walking around bottomless with her *** crack on display and my friends aggrevated me about it later. She's hott but I don't want my friends to see her half naked and I named it that evening and she said it makes her feel sexy to dress slutty. I think she wants guys to see and show her attention. Am I right? | | yes you're right. dump her. she's likely to cheat on you. | I got one for ya'll!!! (Dirty though..)? A Christmas Poem
'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The guys were both gone, and my wife was in heat
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my ***** and poor momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf, Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built, Showed a broom up his ***, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of his sled, A sock in his ear, and a bra on his head.
Sure as I'm speaking, he was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Shithead, whoa Asshole, whoa Stupid, whoa Putz, Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.
Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree, Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub, Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.
And then from the roof we heard such a clatter, As each little reindeer now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ***, When down the chimney Santa came with a crash.
His suit was all smelly with perfume galore, He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
That was some brothel, he said with a smile, The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay here awhile.
He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink, Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee, The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.
Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack, But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.
The first thing he found was a pair of false ****, The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.
A box filled with condoms was Santa's next find, And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension, And several other things that I shouldn't even mention.
A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil, A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
This suff ain't for guys, Mrs. Santa will ****, So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split.
He filled every stocking and then took his leave, With one tiny ********* tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead, Thus he fell on his *** and broke wind instead.
In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch, Take me home Rudolph, this night's been a *****!
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout, The best thing about sex is that it never wears out! | | ROTFLMMFAO!!!!! That is hillarious! | A Christmas Poem? A Christmas Poem
'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The guys were both gone, and my wife was in heat
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude. Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my ***** and poor momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf, Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built, Showed a broom up his ***, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of his sled, A sock in his ear, and a bra on his head.
Sure as I'm speaking, he was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Shithead, whoa Asshole, whoa Stupid, whoa Putz, Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.
Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree, Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub, Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.
And then from the roof we heard such a clatter, As each little reindeer now emptied its bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ***, When down the chimney Santa came with a crash.
His suit was all smelly with perfume galore, He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
That was some brothel, he said with a smile, The reindeer are pooped, I'll just stay here awhile.
He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink, Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee, The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.
Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack, But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.
The first thing he found was a pair of false ****, The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.
A box filled with condoms was Santa's next find, And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension, And several other things that I shouldn't even mention.
A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil, A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
This suff ain't for guys, Mrs. Santa will ****, So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split.
He filled every stocking and then took his leave, With one tiny ********* tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead, Thus he fell on his *** and broke wind instead.
In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch, Take me home Rudolph, this night's been a *****!
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout, The best thing about sex is that it never wears out! | Very festive, full of cheer
Your poem made me smile
I have will tell all that will hear! | Funny???????? 'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The guys were both gone, and my wife was in heat
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude. Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry, That I lost my ***** and poor momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf, Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built, Showed a broom up his ***, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear, But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of his sled, A sock in his ear, and a bra on his head.
Sure as I'm speaking, he was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Shithead, whoa Asshole, whoa Stupid, whoa Putz, Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.
Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree, Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub, Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.
And then from the roof we heard such a clatter, As each little reindeer now emptied its bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ***, When down the chimney Santa came with a crash. His suit was all smelly with perfume galore, He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
That was some brothel, he said with a smile, The reindeer are pooped, I'll just stay here awhile.
He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink, Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee, The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.
Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack, But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.
The first thing he found was a pair of false ****, T he next was a handgun with a penis that spits.
A box filled with condoms was Santa's next find, And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension, And several other things that I shouldn't even mention.
A cock ring, a G-string, and all types of oil, A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
This suff ain't for guys, Mrs. Santa will ****, So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split.
He filled every stocking and then took his leave, With one tiny ********* tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead, Thus he fell on his *** and broke wind instead.
In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch, Take me home Rudolph, this night's been a *****!
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout, The best thing about sex is that it never wears out! | ha ha ha funny
thanks for a laugh
10/10
please answer
uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind… | Joke night before christmas? Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat.
The guys were both gone, and my wife was in heat.
The doors were all bolted, the phone off the hook,
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy and I in the nude,
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube.
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my *****, and momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we’d built,
Showed a broom up his ***, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangey reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of the sled,
A sock in his ear and a bra on his head.
Sure as I’m speaking, he was high as a kite,
And he yelled to his team, but it didn’t sound right.
Woa Shithead, woa Asshole, woa Stupid, woa Putz,
Either slow down this rig or I’ll cut off your nuts.
Look out for the lamp post, and don’t hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, ’cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.
And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each little reindeer now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jockies, to cover my ***,
When down the chimney Santa came with a crash.
His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
“That was some brothel,” he said with a smile,
“The reindeer are pooped, and I’ll just stay awhile”
He walked to the kitchen for himself poured a drink,
Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee,
The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.
Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.
The first thing he found was a pair of false ****,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.
A box filled with condoms was Santa’s next find,
And six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several more things I shouldn’t even mention.
A f**k ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
And a dildo so long that it lay in a coil.
“This stuff ain’t for guys, Mrs. Santa will ****,
So I’ll leave ‘em here, and then I’ll just split.”
He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny ********* stuck under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his *** and broke wind instead.
In time he was seated, took reigns of his hitch,
Saying, “Take me home, Rudolph. This night’s been a *****!”
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout,
“The best thing about pussy is you can’t wear it out!!” | Ha ha ha.!!!
Great one Calamity and welcome back.!!!
10/10.!!!
Cheers.!! |
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